Office Etiquette
The Golden Rule

Office etiquette. That is a huge topic with many little sub topics and endless etiquette questions that could be asked.

The teacher of the lady in the following 1950's film has one golden rule when it comes to office etiquette. "Treat others as you want to be treated. Be considerate of others and enjoy the people you work with."

An excellent piece of advice. Many etiquette questions can be answered with that one sentence.

But it also raises a question. I happen to be grumpy. I don’t want to enjoy my colleagues at least until after I have had two cups of coffee. Also I do not particularly wish to be greeted by people before 10 am and I love silence in the elevator.

Office etiquette golden rule: “Treat others as you want to be treated.”

Office Etiquette Question: Does this also count for grumpies who want to be left alone?

Answer: That depends.

If they are grumpies who work somewhere in the basement of a huge office building, hidden behind stacks and stacks of documents, then yes, they can treat others the way they want to be treated.

They are allowed to ignore people when they enter the building in the morning.

They are allowed to be gruff if they are wished a good morning and then go and hide themselves behind the piles and piles of documents no one ever has any need for.

They will be considered oddities. Every office needs oddities. Someone to warn the new pette about. "Oh, you need to know about that case we worked on in November 1944? You'll have to go and see Miss Grumpy for that. She lives in the basement. I don't think she ever comes out of there. Don't worry. Her bark is worse than her bite. She may be a bit strange but she is quite all right really. And she always finds everything in those enormous stacks of paper. We couldn't do without her."

We couldn't do without her … as long as she stays in that basement!

BUT!!!! If you are a grumpy who wants to make a career then please do not treat people the way you want to be treated. I know you don't want anyone to talk to you before 10 am. I know you wish people would just leave you to do your work in peace. But that is not how it works, my dear.

Mrs. Emily Post on Office Etiquette

"A certain rich man whose appointment to a foreign post of importance was about to be ratified, came into the corridor of a Washington hotel and stopped to speak with a lady for a few moments. During the whole conversation he kept his hat on his head and a cigar in the corner of his mouth. It happened that the lady was the wife of a prominent senator, and she lost no time in reporting the incident to her husband, who in turn brought the matter to the attention of certain of his colleagues with the result that the appointment did not go through.

It is not unlikely that this man thinks "politics played against him," whereas the only factor against him was his exhibition of ill-breeding which proved him unsuitable to represent the dignity of his country."

(Mrs. Emily Post. Etiquette. 1922. Chapter XXXII. Etiquette in Business and Politics)

Even if you deliver excellent work, it is important to stick to office etiquette and be polite. This man Emily Post refers to wishes to represent his country and was considered suitable until he displayed his bad manners. He was not necessarily a grouch like myself but he lacked proper etiquette and manners and was therefore considered too impolite to represent his country.

If you wish to be more than a grouch in the basement of a huge office building you will have to make sure you are suitable to represent your company.

And that means treating people the way they think you wish to be treated. Grumbling when someone wishes you a good morning, or simply keeping your eyes to the ground when walking to the copying machine (in the hopes that no one notices you and starts talking) is not a good idea.

You need to socialize and be pleasant. Buck up and greet your colleagues in the morning. Ask someone in the elevator what her weekend was like.

Unless, of course, you notice that the other person is keeping her eyes to the ground in hopes of not being talked to.

In that case you might modify your office etiquette practices and go to "grouch etiquette" instead.

Ever ringing true,

Cressida B. Bell